Instructions on being Olivia

1. Wear your hair how you want it. When your partner, your mother, your boss complains about the change in your mane, don’t give a shit. Tell them so.
2. Despite your mid-range deafness, listen and hear with more than your ears. It is a gift.
3. Wear clothes in bright layers and huge sparkling jewellery that will one day cause an unknown man on the street ask you if you are in a cult.
4. Bake rock-hard flapjacks that are both delicious and indigestible.
5. Change your mind about everything you used to believe about yourself. Still harbour doubts, but open the door and let them out.
6. Drink red wine and flirt with Italian men half your age.
7. Be braver than you ever thought possible: tell the people who love you what really happened to your childhood.
8. Take risks on the good advice of your intuition. It knows where it’s going.
9. Take your stick the long way round – 800 steps to the sunset in the monastery at the top of an ancient rock in Petra.
10. Take subversive advantage of old lady stereotypes. They never suspect you.
11. Believe. Your difference is what marks you out as exceptional.